random thoughts #3?

some day's I just want to keep you close, just spend my whole life talking, laughing and loving but some day's I just want to yell, shout and get you out of my life. If this is love, im not sure I do want to be in love. I know I can't ask for a friendship with rainbow's, gumdrops and unicorns but relationships can't start with bs from the start, it never works like that but the thing is, I was willing to do anything for a chance but when im so close to what i thought i wanted, it may not even be what i need. Theres a difference between want and need but for some people, they can't understand. I WANT this to work but I NEED you to listen. I NEED you to keep your end of the bargain, and I WANT you to be happy but I NEED you to UNDERSTAND that you can't act like you can get what you want in life. I NEED you to KNOW that im not trying to push you away, I WANT you to be with me my whole life, you're a trophy, you're a prize but some day's you act like such a snob. I WANT you to know that I don't mean to hurt you by saying these negatives but I NEED you to know that it's the only way I can get through to you. The thing we got right now, It's not working, I NEED you to know that when we mean compromise, WE MEAN com-PROMISE. Promise me you won't say those phrases and I promise you I won't either. I made a promise to myself that I would try my hardest not to hurt you, but the thing is by trying not to hurt you, I've said some "rude"(that's putting it in general) things to innocent people. This week has been hard and I thought you could make it better but you've been contributing cause honestly, I haven't been that mad before. Maybe i'll continue this later, I really need to finish my socials and study but yeeah, I just had this on my mind.